Motherly Love

Here’s hoping that everyone who mothers (this applies to anyone) had a wonderful Mother’s Day yesterday. Often our efforts are met with sporadic displays of gratitude, and if you feel that sometimes it’s all for nothing, then don’t despair, this is for you too.

 

Dear Mom,

It’s been 33 years since you passed away and for many years after you died I still bought or made a Mother’s Day card for you. Strong is the memory of a mother’s love. I never got the chance to thank you personally before you died for all you did for me, but I have so much to be thankful for and I know my letter to you will find you somewhere, somehow.

Thank you for your selflessness, love, and every single sacrifice. I think I turned out to be a smart, well-adjusted, well-balanced, healthy, happy, and responsible person, thanks to you. Thank you for all the the nutritious meals, trips to the dentist, buckets of sunscreen, and checkups at the doctor’s office. Thank you for the clean clothes, packed lunches, made beds, and endless school supplies. Thank you for letting me make so many horrible mistakes and loving me through the aftermath. Thank you for being steady as a rock when I was wavering. Thank you for all the times you rubbed my back, my feet, or brushed my hair, reminding me that I am worthy of love and tenderness. Thank you for every time you took care of me when I was sick, especially when you were sick too and never got to rest or complain. Thank you for taking me on such wonderful holidays and giving me such beautiful memories. Thank you for respecting my opinions even though they were often loud and didn’t match yours. Thank you for welcoming my friends into our home and loving them too. Thank you for letting me know that my problems were not “the end of the world” and that there were “lots more fish in the sea”. Thank you for being a wonderful role model and for not intimidating me. Thank you for not spoiling me but providing the best for me that you could. I know you had a busy life of your own, but thank you for making me feel that mine really mattered to you. Thank you mom for inspiring me to become everything I am today. Thank you for being my mom.
 

Summer 1977

The Vagina Monologues (The Ultimate Girl's Night Out)

Mu running routine has ramped up to a whole new level over the past two months and it's been hugely transformative. Since winter soccer ended in early March I’ve been trail running twice a week with a small "band" of ladies from my soccer team. I have to admit, up until now I've always been a dedicated "dyed-in-the-wool" solo runner and perfectly happy that way. But now I have a new love...trail running with my "buddies".

I believe that friends who run together move forward together. Our little band of runners have become partners in growth. We are wide open to change and crave transformation. A run has become more of a moving classroom of sorts as we alternate between student and teacher, listening and leading. It’s not like we are training for the Olympics, or even to win a race. We train to become healthier, stronger, faster, more focused, more balanced, more joyful and better equipped to endure. Not just in running, but in all areas of our lives.

Running with these ladies can be likened to starring in a local episode of the “Vagina Monologues”. Straitlaced conversation just doesn't exist out on the trail, literally “anything” goes and usually does. Our topics of conversation range from the sublime to the bizarre, from the witty to the hilarious, from the lusty to the poignant. After two months of running together, I can honestly say that these ladies are a force of nature to be reckoned with. They are alive with passion and conviction and I love every minute of every run.

Our ages vary across two decades and like a close-knit family sitting down for Sunday dinner, we all bring something different to the table. Some are great planners, organising and strategizing our routes in advance. Some bring strength on the hills. They use this natural talent to pull the pack up and over. Some are good at navigation and keep us all moving in the right direction. Some are inspirational and motivate us when we are in need of morale. Some are comics and use humour to diffuse tension or fatigue. Some are nurses and emotional paramedics. They have the ability to heal or bandage us along the way. Some are the strong, silent type. You can’t put your finger on exactly what they bring to the table until you run without them and then you realise their constancy fills a hole that leaks energy in their absence. Some are seasoned runners, others bring new perspectives. Some are chroniclers, they remember every route and every story. Some are grammarians who invent new and interesting words as we run. Some follow instruction, some follow the pack, some follow their hearts, but together, we are complete.

Last weekend one of our ladies ran in her first race - a 10k in Victoria. She didn't run with our group, but she carried a little piece of all us with her as she ran. We knew this experience would shape and refine her. We knew that some miles would be easy and light and some miles would be arduous like wading through heavy mud. We knew that her experience on hills would serve her well. We knew that crossing that finish line she would be victorious and triumphant. She was brave and strong and new. And we were all as proud of her as if we had run the race ourselves.

Running is important to us. It is a catalyst for many other things and it cuts across the crap that muddies life in other areas. Running with my buddies has made me stronger and faster. I run longer. I run farther. And I run more hills. More often than not, I push my own limits. Running gives me a sense of vigor and empowerment. It rejuvenates me.


I don't know if running has changed my life or if I changed my life for running. But who cares? My feet keep moving, my arms keep pumping and my week would not be the same if I didn't get in some quality time with my sure-footed, fast-talkin' buddies. Every run is an adventure and adventure is good for the soul.

female adj the art of being all things to everyone at all times

woman n, pl women the art of being all things to everyone at all times and still wearing makeup

lady n, pl -dies the art of being all things to "certain" people at all times

mother n (see guilt) all of the above and much much more

- from "The Vagina Monologues" By Eve Ensler

Running with Power Tools

It’s been an easy running week, despite the weather. Spring was supposed to arrive on the West Coast but instead Winter finally arrived...a little late and it came with a vengeance. I sit and type/talk to you from my new office, which at this point is still scattered with packing boxes and I am nestled snuggly in the middle of it all as outside the wind and rain batters the heck out of my new house.

But still the running has been easy. When I returned home from yesterday’s run, it occurred to me that I haven’t needed to use my new “power tool” in quite some time: my running mantra.

I discovered this powerful tool a few months ago when I caught myself struggling during certain runs. There were some days when I struggled just to get out the door in the morning...I found I was defeating myself mentally before I even began. So I developed a running mantra: a short phrase which I repeat to myself to help cope with the discomfort that sometimes comes with running.  

 

To achieve your running goals, powerful legs and big lungs aren’t always enough...you also need a strong head. Doubts and distractions can derail even your best attempts, but a well-chosen mantra can keep you calm and on target.

The word “mantra” is derived from two Sanskrit words. The first is “manas” or “mind,” which provides the “man” syllable. The second syllable is drawn from the Sanskrit word “trai” meaning to “protect” or to “free from.” Therefore, the word mantra in its most literal sense means “to free from the mind.” Mantra is, at its core, a tool used by the mind that can free one from the vagaries of the mind. These short words or phrases have long been used to focus the mind in meditation.

An effective mantra addresses what you want to feel, not the adversity you’re trying to overcome...it diverts your mind from thoughts that reinforce your discomfort to thoughts that help you transcend it.

I found it to be a tremendous tool and began using it immediately when I found negative thoughts beginning to pile up. Instead of thinking “oh, my legs are tired” or “oh, this hill really sucks", I began repeating my mantra instead. It worked like a charm.

So what makes a good mantra? One that’s short, positive, instructive, and full of action words.

My favorite running mantras:

Run Fast Feel Strong

Up and Over, Over and Up (good for running a steep hill)

Light and Smooth

I looked around the internet and found some great ones:

You think this is pain? This is not pain, this is you getting your butt in shape. Now move it!

Relax and flow

I may not be fast, but I sure ain’t last.

Turn and Burn

I may not have needed a mantra on my last few runs, and I may not need one during the next few, but there’s no doubt there will be many a run where I will need to free my mind from the weights of doubt and negative thoughts. Mantras are tools of power and tools for power. They are formidable. They are ancient. They work.

A Hole in the Road

Have you heard the one about the guy walking down the street who falls into a hole in the road?

This guy’s walking down the street when he falls into a hole in the road.  The walls are so steep he can’t get out.

A doctor passes by and the guy shouts up, “Hey doctor!  I’ve fallen into this hole and I can’t get out.  Can you please help me out?” The doctor looks at him, sees that he’s only got a few minor scrapes on his leg, and writes a prescription, throws it down in the hole and walks on.

Then a priest comes along and the guy shouts up, “Father, I’m down in this hole can you help me out?”  The priest writes out a prayer, throws it down in the hole and moves on.

 Then a friend walks by, “Hey, Joe, it’s me!  I’ve fallen into this big hole!  Can you help me out?”  And the friend jumps in the hole.  Our guy says, “Are you stupid? Now we’re both down here.” The friend says, “Yeah, but I’ve been down here before and I know the way out.”

--The West Wing, episode #210 “Noel”, when Leo tells Josh this story.

It’s been a few weeks since I’ve checked in on this blog and for good reason...there’s been a hole in my road. We moved house last week and it was a momentous job to say the least. Pretty much everything in my life has taken a back seat to the move, including this blog. But we are now “in” and I am anxious to get out of this hole and back into my life.

Speaking of my life, it’s funny how my running often imitates it.

 In spite of the fact I am loving the new house, going for a simple run has proved to be a little more challenging than at the old house. I no longer have a giant neighborhood just steps from my front door in which to run in a dozen different directions. In fact just a 2-minute jog from my front door is the twisty Sea-to-Sky Highway; a beautiful stretch of road that hugs the coast all the way to the top of Howe Sound. I’m sure running this stretch of road would make for a picturesque run, but the thought of running it on a dreary, dark winter morning conjures up frightening images of being mowed down by a speeding vehicle or two. Basically, there’s a hole in my running road too.

Hwy 99 - The Sea-to-Sky Highway

We all have our own different ways of dealing with holes in the road. There is no wrong or right way. There’s only our own way whether that might be thinking on it for a while, jumping in with both feet, or sitting on the fence indefinitely. I’ve never been one to back down from a challenge, but I’m not a “jump-in-with-both-feet” thinker either, this tends to get me into situations I don’t care to be in. I guess I prefer to think about the situation for a little bit, and try to come up with a plan. A good plan.

I will admit I was a little worried at first that not having the perfect running situation right outside my front door would cause me to just not run anymore. Not good! So I pulled out Gmaps Pedometer and spent a little time exploring some new routes just a short drive from my house. The results were good. Less than a five minute drive away I was able to map out several routes that would work well for good sized runs, both on road and trail. Things were looking up. After running a couple of the routes I found access to even more areas that were not that apparent on Gmaps Pedometer. Even better!

Heading out for a run now in the morning is not quite the same as before...I have to get in my car first and drive for a few minutes, then there is the jingle of my car keys in my pocket as I run which is a little annoying, and then of course the sweaty drive back home...but at least I am out there running and just about out of the hole.

Down in the Running-Dumps.

 

I’ve got that January down-in-the-dumps feeling. Maybe it’s because the weather’s so awful. Or maybe it’s because I’m getting less daylight than a stunted dandelion. Or maybe it’s because my body is struggling to cope with the withdrawal of all the calorific foods I consumed through the festive period. Or maybe it’s because I had too many tequila mistakes on my too-short vacation. Maybe it’s because I have yet to start my New Year’s Resolution. Or maybe it’s because my house is stacked wall to wall with packing boxes. The list is endless.

The Monday of all Mondays has come and gone. Blue Monday. The day considered the most depressing day of the year. But I’m still depressed. To be honest, my vote is in to do away with the Blue Monday business and bring in Blue January...the most depressing month of the year. Because, let's face it, the majority of people are not blue for just one day at this time of year, they're like me and blue for the entire month.

Exercise is supposed to be a good way to boost your mood and help alleviate the “blues”. But just getting out the door for a much needed run is easier said than done when it’s cold, dark and dreary outside.

Feelings like this bring up the question “Am I a real runner?”

This morning I woke up at the crack of dawn to lace up my sneakers for my second run this week after returning home from vacation. Sipping a hot cup of coffee I checked the weather gauge and it showed a chilly -3.7 C. Oh good, I thought, I get to dress up like the Michelin Man. 

Trying to whip up another ounce of motivation I peered out the window to get a handle on the rest of the weather. It was pitch black. I mean really pitch black. I couldn’t even see the lights of Vancouver. I thought to myself there must be a power outage or something over there. Then I realized we were completely socked in...and it was snowing. I checked the weather gauge again, the temperature had dropped to -4.7 C. And just as if I was watching a Much Music Pop Up Video a popular three-letter acronym popped to the forefront of my mind and I seriously considered going back to bed. Then something strange happened. A giddy child-like excitement took over. It was snowing...and I was going out to play in it. No wait, I was going out to run in it. 

 I dressed warmly and headed out into the whiteness. There was only a skiff of snow, but it was enough that it squeaked beneath my feet. At first the biting head wind hurt my face but once I was in the shelter of the trees, it was divine. It was deathly quiet, there were barely any cars on the road and no tracks in the snow before me. I chose a route that gave me an option of extending the run if I was so inclined. This particular run is a “first” for me. The “wet” coast doesn’t usually get a lot of snow in the winter, and the micro-climate of Caulfeild gets even less than the rest of the lower mainland. It’s not that I haven’t wanted to run in the snow, it’s just that there hasn’t been any since I began running.

I ran with a surprising amount of energy considering the weather conditions, my many layers of clothing, and the fact I hadn’t ran a decent distance in well over a week. I made my way to the point where I could extend the run or just head home and I decided to extend the run to 8 km. I love discovering new routes, and running in the snow was just that. I even felt strong while running up hill, likely due to my snowshoe kick-step technique which oddly distracted me from the fact I was running uphill. It was snowing, I was running and it totally felt good.

Back at my house I felt triumphant. The run had been epic. I felt like Jumpin’ Jack Flash and there was even a smile on my face. 

Dear Running,

I am totally in to you and ready to take our relationship to the next level. You put a spring in my step and give my face a glow that no spa facial could ever give me. You’ve even chased those moody blues away, at least for today. Maybe we should make it Facebook official.

xoxo
Julie

I guess it’s official. I’m a real runner.

I hope the snow sticks around so I can do it all again tomorrow.

Twenty Twelve

Yet another new year is here. Where did the old one go? Is it just me or have the past few new years arrived a little too fast and furious?

I have to admit I like the sound of “Twenty Twelve”. I like the way it glides easily off the tongue. It even oozes a little confidence, like it already knows it’s going to be a good year. Last year really was a mouthful to say the least, “Two Thousand and Eleven”. But “Twenty Twelve”...well it really has a nice ring to it.

I love New Year’s Resolutions, but only if they are simple and attainable. Last year I resolved to “keep on running” which looking back on that now was pretty much like resolving to keep on sleeping or eating. This year I’m really going out on a limb. I resolve to take up yoga. This is something a bit different for me and the idea behind it is an attempt to keep my newly limbered body (thanks to many hours of physio) more supple and balanced. Of course there are many health benefits to yoga so hopefully it will fit in with my lifestyle and complement my running and soccer regimes. I’ll keep you posted on my progress.

Speaking of running, it was mighty difficult to find the motivation to get out there over the Christmas period. No doubt the usual suspects were to blame: rich food, lively spirits, and sleeping late. Sometimes it takes a little kick in the butt from my collection of motivational running quotes to get me going in the morning. Here are some of my favorites:

"Over the next three months, running became my own form of Prozac. I hit the pavement three or four days a week, rarely exceeding three miles. Those jogs didn't give my husband a job, but they helped me keep it together and stay positive until a company did offer him a position five months later. Running is no longer my last resort; now it's my drug of choice."

Colleen Oakley, A Runner's High, fitnessmagazine.com

"The 10K race is a metaphor for living a good life. No matter what you do in life, don't just be a spectator, be a player. Anyone can watch from the sidelines, but few participate in the race. Choose to become the hero that you want to be."

Mark G. Collis, Becoming Your Own Hero

"At first I was running just to lose weight, and then after about six months when I was increasing the distance of my long runs, I was intrigued and fascinated how the human body can go from barely able to run a mile to being able to run eight miles. It was the day before this eight-mile run that I had this weird feeling—I could not wait to get up in the morning to do that eight-mile run. "

Jeff Mastro, Runner and Restaurant Owner

"Running rejuvenates not just my quads but also my creativity. It's in my sneakers that I often stumble, sometimes literally, upon good ideas - how to iron out a spat with my husband, what to cook for a dinner party, or just the right plot twist for my novel."

Allison Winn Scotch, Jog Your Mind, fitnessmagazine.com

"Something happened to me when I crossed the finish line. I became a runner. It makes me feel so good about myself. I'm no longer afraid of anything because I've seen what I'm capable of."

Heather Walsh, Runner and Liver Donor

"I don't know if running changed my life or if I changed my life for running, but who cares really? My feet keep moving, my arms keep pumping, and my mantra keeps rolling, 'Be patient. You got this.'"

Valerie DiMambro, Running World Challenger

"I search for hills to run, no matter where I'm traveling. Maybe it's just the way I'm wired: I like confrontation, and hills are nothing, if not confrontation. Just the hill and me. Just the challenge and me. Just my fears and me. Bring it on."

Martin Dugard, To Be A Runner

"If I didn't run, my writing would be very different from what it is. To be a fiction writer, the most important qualities are imaginative ability, intelligence, and focus. To keep these going at a high level, you can't neglect your physical strength. Otherwise, you can't accomplish anything very intricate or demanding."

Haruki Murakami, Novelist

"I don't need to reward myself after a run. For me, putting in a long run is reward enough for a hard week. That said, I do have a cupcake waiting for me after today's run."

Emily Procter, Actress

"Bid me run, and I will strive with things impossible."

Shakespeare, Julius Caesar

 

...and sometimes all it takes is a small reward waiting at the end of the run...I'm off for a well-earned cupcake. Wishing you all a wonderful Twenty Twelve!